Learning to dance

October 25, 2008

When you have been married for more than 10 years and suddenly find yourself single you have to learn things all over again.  Or in some cases, learn new things.  I got married and had a child before I turned 21.  I never went out dancing, sat at a bar, flirted with random guys.  When I found myself single again, with every other weekend free, I have discovered one of the things I enjoy is going out dancing.  But it is an art, there is so much to learn.

I love dancing, always have.  It started with middle school dances where the boys all stood along the wall while the girls danced in groups with their girlfriends.  By high school I was dancing with boys.  Fast forward 15 years and this is not High School Prom.  Although at the beginning of the night the guys are standing along the edges of the dance floor watching the girls dance in groups with their friends.

For some of you this may come as second nature.  For me it was a myriad of new experiences.  Everything from ordering a drink, making eye contact with the cute guy on the other side of the dance floor, even walking through the crowd.  The first time I tried it I was looking for wide open spaces, now I just plow right through, not caring what brushes where.

I have a girlfriend who can start dancing the moment we arrive and stay out there the entire time, no matter what’s playing.  For me it takes time to warm up and a good DJ/ band.  Because lets face it, good music can make or break the dancing experience.  I have learned the Cupid Shuffle, the Cha Cha slide and more RAP songs then I ever thought I would.  As a general rule the music we dance to is not stuff that would typically make it onto my iPod.  Umm… just for the record I thought a “shorty” was a kid?  So now it’s your girl?  Crap, I’m so old.

Eventually I am out on the dance floor.  I love dancing with friends and their friends.  And I love dancing with boys, as long as they keep their hands on my hips and off my ass.  Last night I ran into several guys from my gym, they may be way too young for me but they were lots of fun to dance with. Eventually the dreaded last call comes.  Only once have I actually given out my number, these days I’m sticking to – “I’ll see you next time.”  Because the reality is Mr. Right is probably not out there on the dance floor and all I really need is Mr. Right Now.

With everything I’m learning as a single girl again, one of my favorites has been learning to dance. To the left, to the left…



  1. Your too cute! I had fun a few weeks past looking at guys on plenty of fish with a friend. She kept clicking on guys under 30. I said, what am I going to do with a guy that young, she responded with a look 😉

  2. I know – all the slang these days really does make me feel old too! Keep on dancing!

  3. I once told my cousin who was looking for the “right” guy and couldn’t find him…Stop looking and go out and have fun…which includes dancing always….1 year later she met Rob (took her three meetings to give up the phone number) 7 years and two kids later, they are extremely happy. Just go out and have fun !!!!! (P.S. Who needs a stinkin man anyway)

  4. In all fairness it’s kinda’ hard for us to keep our hands on your hips and off your ass when you’re shakin’ it… Take it as a compliment.

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