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I let him in

May 15, 2009

When my marriage failed I was devastated. My heart was broken. You don’t just forget that kind of pain. The pain dulls, your heart heals but you can remember how bad it hurts to hurt. And you never want to hurt like that again.

And now I’m alone. And I’m lonely. And I’m ready to start dating again. I don’t want to be alone anymore.

And I’ve met someone.

I like spending time with him. I like camping with him. I like watching him with my kids. I like the way my heart skips a beat when his name comes up on my caller ID. I like him.

Yesterday when he got to my house he kissed me and then he held me. And then he let me drive his truck. His big, redneck truck. At dinner he ordered for me. And by the time he left last night I realised that I had let him in. To my heart.

And now I’m scared. Because I let him in to my heart, a heart that knows what it feels like to be broken. A heart that can remember the pain. And I’m scared. Because I let him in.

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2 comments

  1. I can only imagine how scary that must be (since I’m not brave enough to do that myself). It’s sounds like you’re moving forward though. Good for you for moving past the fear and living your life anyway.


  2. I can understand your worries and concerns, but this is good news. Live your life. Don’t let prior heartbreaks rule your life, you may miss ‘the one’ if you do. Go for it. Enjoy it.

    And if it all turns sour; at least you won’t be left wondering ‘what if’ …



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