The other woman

July 13, 2009

My girlfriend called me this morning with the starteling revelation that she thinks her husband is cheating. When she started going into detail of why she thinks this my heart broke for her. Because she’s right, the signs are there. She knows the truth even if she’s still kidding herself with her husband’s cover stories. (No judgement because I have been there.)

The other thing that surprises me is who he’s cheating with. The other woman, Jennifer, left her husband, Robert, several months ago. Robert is a good friend of my younger brother, so I called my brother immediately. He wasn’t surprised apparently Robert was not exactly a faithful husband. (Small towns – gotta love ’em.) Are you keeping up?

Anyway. The part that frustrates me the most is that Jennifer was cheated on. She knows how it feels. And she’s willing to help put another woman through that pain. That sense of rejection, the blow to your self esteem, that misery that comes when you find out the person you love is cheating on you? How do you do that to someone else? Now please know that I am not letting my friend’s husband off the hook. Ultimately he is the one causing his wife pain, he is the one who pledged himself to her. But Jennifer, allowing herself to be involved in the destruction of another family? When her’s was so recently destroyed by the same thing?

I just don’t get it. I probably never will.



  1. Cheating is rarely about the other person’s spouse or significant other. It’s about your own low self esteem.

    That sucks for your friend. It’s painful to have to go throush something like that.

  2. I agree that it’s the husband’s fault for making that decision, but it’s hard to understand why the other woman would do that. It’s just hard to understand all the way around.

  3. Because sometimes when people hurt, the only way they can think of dealing with that is to hurt someone – and usually, not the right someone. That doesn’t make it right, of course, but that’s probably the rationalization Jennifer’s subconsciously giving herself.

  4. I will never understand how women do that to other women. When my ex and I split because of his infidelity I swore I would never put another woman through that pain. And I’ve been true to my word.

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